Geoffrey Sessions
From IBWiki
Political Career
Ran for sheriff of parish Montgomery on a platform consisting solely of "kickin six kinds of hell out o them damned Philly Yankees and Louisianan Catholics".
Made an unsuccessful bid for GM in 1990 crying "Let's get them damned English Catholics out of American business!"
Has been providing comic relief from Mobile as MP since the early 1980s with gems like the following...
Some famous quotes
- "We must hereby seek the complete annulment of the abberant Louisianan nation!"
- "We must boycott all Lousianan goods marked with that Satanic metric rubbish. How do you know if they're really giving you a bushelworth of apples when you end up with some damned little basket marked in gibberish!?"
- "I swear, it was two Arvo birds in red frizzy wigs what done it!"
- "...it's because the whole lot of em are in cahoots with space aliens."
- "That's right, Larry, this is just part of their First President's plot to take over the NAL."
- "And I'll tell you this: the ungodly admission of foreign devils within the sacred precincts of the Council Fire is as a sure sign of the End Times as we could hope for!" 30/07/2004
Political Staying Power
The question often arises in political circles Exactly how does this obvious hack not only remain in office but increase in popularity with each passing election?
Philidelphian political commentator Trish Dunn explained on The Press Engaged, a weekly political / current events programme broadcast by the ABC: "Harold Limbaugher got it spot on this week on his show. He astutely reminded us that, above all else, "this ìs the South!" He manages to stay in office by giving people generous portions of what they want most from their politicians: promises of a trimmer, healthier government while actually ensuring that a sufficient number of pounds go for local projects (not all of which are fatback projects). You balance the whole thing by ensuring local monies aren't trimmed too much and that fellow provincials on the Scheme get taken care of and Bob's thine uncle.
He's really no worse than any other American politician (as evidenced by any slice of political rhetoric you care to listen to), apart from the obvious fixation on Martians. But then again, it seems to me he's just playing into cultural concerns over Martians! We're on the cusp of the space age, after all and Certain Neighbours are reaching out to space, and of course there's all the legitimate concerns over Louisianna's shady sytem of measures and trade practices, First President Young's so-called "reforms" (it is a wonder he hasn't been assasinated by now) and vague military capability. It all adds up to considerable mistrust on the part of the border provinces, and Mr Sessions plays into that just enough to engage those voters with real or imagined concerns."
